I Swear You Will Be Fine

Sometimes I think we are all losing our minds. You would probably be saying, “seriously guys?”. The scientific minds we usually have are now looking to the skies, to the birds, the rainbows…..everything….that can somehow make us feel like you are talking to us. Or helping us feel close to you. You are all around us as well as within us. This is what we need to keep believing. In many ways, we cannot believe you are not here anymore, and maybe that is because, you are still here.

The crows always seem to be talking to us. You always said the raven or crow was your favourite bird. At the time, I thought it was horrid. Now, I look forward to seeing them. When I am driving, when I am looking out through the window. I even look forward to hearing them squawk when I’m sleeping. There have been so many signs you have given us. As Aunty Kal said, “At this point, these are not even signs. This is a conversation”. Thank you for the purple flowers, the bubbles, the hedgehogs, the snow owls, and so much more.

Last night, you came to me in my dreams. One of the rare occasions you did (you’re probably going to Sha most nights, and that is fine!). You were sitting in your chair in your room, without your shirt as usual. I hugged you and kissed your head- twice! And said to you, “How can this be? You aren’t here anymore. But as long as I can hug you and kiss you, I will be happy!”. It was so, so real. Thank you for that.

Hugs and kisses, love you my darling,

Mum