I Swear You Will Be Fine

This was the piece I originally intended to upload on Day 172. At first, I was just going to share a few stories of us with the boys, but when I saw Cadbury and Knight sitting outside your room, I was inspired to tweak my writing for Day 172. These stories, like many others, are ones I hold close to my heart, and I thought it would be nice to share them – almost like I’m immortalizing our moments through my writing. Memories like these never fail to bring smiles to my face, especially when they are paired with reading our texts.

Even before I met the boys, I felt like I knew them. You’d talk about them all the time, send me pictures and videos of them being cute or “stupid” (as you would often jokingly call them). I always thought that if someone had two dogs, they’d have a favorite. But seeing you day after day with the boys, I know for sure that you love them both equally – you play with Knight so much more than Cadbury, but you’d always cuddle and carry Cadbury so much more than Knight. The love you have for them was actually equal.

I knew how much the boys meant to you (I’m sure they still do) so I was quite nervous to meet them in fear that they might not like me and that would make you not want to have me around. Thankfully, they were so friendly and loving that it was impossible to not get along with them. In no time, they became my favorites too and I’d look forward to spending time with them every day. They were always really good at listening to you, and I was always the softer one, so it was a rare occasion for them to listen to my instructions instead of yours. There was one afternoon though, a few weeks after I’d met them, when Cadbury decided to be a little cheeky. We were all in your room, the door was open, and my bag was on the floor with its front pockets open. Without any apparent trigger, Cadbury ran to my bag, popped his head into it, took a packet of tissues out, and ran out of the room. I caught a glimpse of this, and panicked because I thought he was going to eat it and fall sick. I frantically tapped you and said, “CADBURY TOOK SOMETHING, QUICK QUICK!” and you ran out after him. Whilst the both of us were chasing him around the dining table, you were apologizing, saying, “I’m so sorry, he doesn’t usually do this!” And I was reassuring you, “It’s fine, I’m okay with this! I’m just worried he’ll eat it and fall sick or something!” After several minutes of chasing him and calling him a “bad boy”, you gave up and said, “I don’t think he’ll eat it. He’s going to drop it sooner or later, let’s just leave him.” But I was still a little worried, so I got on all fours, crawled halfway under the table, gently tapped the floor, and told him, “Cadbury, drop it please!” You were now on all fours too, telling me he wouldn’t listen and that he’ll be fine. It surprised us both, when he looked at me and put the packet down. I quickly took it and praised him for being such a good boy. You looked at me with shock clearly written all over your face. I was secretly really thankful that it worked because you seemed quite impressed.

A few months later, the boys had gotten used to my presence and would occasionally listen to me too. I’d be able to leash the boys up for walks if you were busy, and they’d sometimes follow me around. I was starting to get confident “babysitting” them without your presence. By this time, we had developed a routine of going to the gym together after school. One day, I was feeling lazy and told you that you could go without me, and that I’d wait at home with the boys. You were doubtful and said, “Really? Would you be okay with them?” I was certain, “It’ll be fine, I won’t take them out of the room, and they should be good boys.” I could not have been more wrong. Turns out, they were only listening to me when you were around. After they heard you leave the house, they perked up. I thought they were tense that you weren’t home, so I tried to reassure them that it’s okay and you were just going to the gym and would be back shortly. I started playing with them to help them feel better – in hindsight, they were probably not feeling bad… This is regret number one because Knight got so excited he started jumping around. I spammed you with texts and videos of him bumping into Cadbury, bumping into me, jumping all over, and you couldn’t stop laughing. This was merely five minutes after you left. I had another 20 or 25 minutes to go, but I didn’t want to rush your gym time. My next worry was that he’d get too excited and pee all over your bed. So, I decided to take them out of the room – my mindset was: pee on the floor would be easier to clean up than pee on your bed. We left the room and now Cadbury was excited too. He thought we were going for a walk, and after he realized we weren’t, he sat waiting by the door for your arrival. I felt so bad seeing him sit by the door that I tried to engage them both with toys – enormous regret number two – Knight has a crazy amount of energy and kept snatching the toys from Cadbury. Cadbury was growling and Knight, the socially unaware pup, kept running around and brushing against him. I then decided that I’d have to calm them both down or they’d start fighting. I took the toys back, and sat on the floor. Cadbury came over to sit with me and eventually Knight did too. I thought of how they seem so calm when you play the piano, so I decided to play instrumental songs on my phone (I felt bad if they had to wait in silence, and I’m not sure they would enjoy hearing me talk the whole time). There was still ten minutes to go before you came back. All this while I’d been sending you videos and texts and you were seriously enjoying my distress. When you got back, you laughed so hard you joined us on the floor, and I told you how taking the two of them for 30 minutes was more tiring than taking a whole class of kids for a full day. It felt like I’d gotten my workout without going to the gym.

I’m glad you got so many laughs from that day, but I also told you I’d never skip another gym day with you ever again – you laughed when I said that this chaos must have been my punishment for being lazy (surprise surprise: I did skip another gym day a few weeks later, convinced I could do a better job at handling the boys… I was wrong – another series of chaotic events happened, and it ended with me on the floor with them again, this time watching “Bluey”… and of course, you got a few more laughs out of that day too).

As sad as I am that it won’t be the four of us again for a while, I am so thankful that we have so many memories of the four of us.

Can’t wait to see you again. There might be a part three… I just remembered all the times Cadbury bit me (and your reactions)! I love you more, always, and forever.

Love always,
Sha