I Swear You Will Be Fine

Since Joshua’s mum was writing about IO W, I thought I’d share my version of my interactions with him. This will likely be a two-part series. Honestly, like Joshua’s mum said, this guy has given us so many funny stories I can’t even stay upset with him for long. Of course, I’m not saying there weren’t an infinite number of ways he or the police force could have handled this better – because off the top of my head I can think of at least 10 things they should have done differently. But at least we laughed on the way home. At least we laughed on the calls with Joshua’s sister. And at least we laughed with Joshua’s grandparents about this guy.

Firstly, when I was called to come down to the station months after I had returned from Japan, I was already thinking about how inefficient the force was – they knew I was already here from the beginning of January, but it took them literal months to call me in for a statement when I was the last person Joshua had texted.

Secondly, I was “lucky” enough to be interviewed by the same IO W I’ve heard so many stories about; sorry, “stories” is not the right word, “warnings” fits better. I was already bracing myself for what he could possibly say or ask me, knowing how insensitive he had been to Joshua’s family, but nothing could have prepared me for what he actually said. Going to the station to give a statement about my boyfriend who had passed while I was on vacation was already hard enough, and I thought I’d be in a puddle of tears if I was asked to speak, but I was left so dumbfounded I could not even tear up, so maybe I should be grateful I was “blessed” by IO W’s “intelligence”.

Let’s begin going through some of the instances that left me wondering what training the force has to undergo.

1. When IO W came to greet us (Joshua’s mum very kindly accompanied me), after we were waiting for about 20 minutes (even though he was expecting our arrival), he told me to come with him to one of the empty rooms upstairs. As we were waiting for the elevator, he suddenly turned to me and asked, “Eh, you are above 21, right?” I gave a curt nod, and thought, “If I was not above 21, wouldn’t you be in trouble for calling me down here without ensuring I was accompanied by a legal adult, and when you had just pulled me away from one?”
2.  As we entered the tiny lift with five others who didn’t seem to be investigating the same case, he turned to me and said, “Did Joshua ever tell you ‘I want to —- myself, I want to —- myself’ like that?” This one actually left me speechless. I think my jaw dropped in horror before I could speak. The interview hasn’t begun, we were in a lift filled with other people so he’s definitely breaking some confidentiality protocols here, and… that was just so insensitive. I responded with a firm “no”, and he didn’t say a word until we were in the shabby-looking room with stained cloth chairs.
3.  As Joshua’s mum said, he took out his on-the-verge-of-disintegrating-computer and began the questions. I remember watching this man type and thinking, “huh… my grandma, who doesn’t speak English, might type my statement faster than you, with less spelling errors too.” At one point he asked me about the mental health struggles Joshua was facing, after a lot of explanation about mental health on my part, and I said he had BPD. This is how the conversation went:
   – Sha: He had BPD. It’s characterized by a fear of abandonment, impulsivity… you know.
   – IO W: PPD?
   – Sha: *muffled sigh* No, B P D. Borderline Personality Disorder? (I thought since Joshua’s family had introduced him to the concept of BPD, it should have rang a bell for him; I was very wrong, it appears bells do not ring in this man’s head.)
   – IO W: Oh. *types with one finger, one letter at a time, with noticeable spelling errors*
   *Conversation continues for a couple of minutes*
   – IO W: Then just now you say he personal…
   – Sha: Huh, what?
   – IO W: Just now you say that one… personal… something
   – Sha: Personality? Borderline Personality Disorder? BPD?
   – IO W: Ya ya, that one! Like this? *turns the computer to me*
   – Sha: Oh, you spelt it wrong, wait. *corrects the spelling of BPD, notices one billion grammatical and spelling errors that were underlined by Microsoft Word, corrects the first line of errors including the misspelling of my name, gives up as there were too many*
   – IO W: What you doing ah? Don’t change anything!!
   – Sha: *looks at him in defeat* There were some errors… but never mind.
4. Before the questions about Joshua began:
   – IO W: Eh, how come you come with the mother ah?
   – Sha: What? Oh. I visit them about three times a week. So, she was so kind, you know, to come with me. (I shouldn’t have added “you know” in my sentences to him… seeing as it appears he doesn’t know much.)
   – IO W: Oh. Can I write that you visit Josh three times a week?
   – Sha: What? No, I meant now I visit his family three times a week, not him. I saw him almost every day.
   – IO W: Oh, okay.
   *When he showed me the statement at the end of the interview, he wrote that I visited Josh three times a week when he was alive*
   – Sha: *sigh*
   – IO W: Why?
   – Sha: Nothing….
5. As we were heading back downstairs in the same tiny lift with another few people, he asked me if I knew the password to Joshua’s laptop. In my head, I was wondering if that meant they had done nothing with the laptop so far – I was not wrong. I said I might know the password and I could try it. In the end, the laptop had no battery, so I couldn’t attempt to unlock it in front of him, and he was already planning to return it to us that day. After Joshua’s mum had signed the form and took the laptop, he turned to me and said, “Can you Whatsapp me the password tonight?” In disbelief, which I’m sure was written all over my face, I said, “But you’re giving us the laptop to take home now?” And he said “yes” before we parted ways. Pray tell, if we are taking the laptop back, how would me sending you the password do anything for your investigation if you don’t have the laptop?

There were so many more instances that made me want to either facepalm, genuinely ask what training he had to go through to become an IO, or send a text to Joshua’s mum under the table saying “I think this whole thing is a big fat prank”.

But like we said, at least our interactions with him were a form of comedic relief… I’m betting Joshua sent us this guy to provide us with some laughs and make this a little easier on us. Although I’m thinking any of us could do investigative work better than he can… I mean, my English is not fantastic, but surely I can phrase at least one sentence without errors?

Josh, thank you for making us laugh from where you are. I can’t wait to see you again and we can all sit together and laugh about this guy. I love you more, always, and forever.

Love always,
Sha