I Swear You Will Be Fine

Between us, I think we’ve always had good laughs about languages – accents, different pronounciations, enunciations, puns (and jokes) and possibly slightly mean judging looks at some for all of the above. Sha and i had a good laugh over lunch recently about how some people in our lives mispronounce common words and they stick with us for the rest of our lives. same day, i struggled with a word that’s supposed to mean “satisfaction” – we all had to google to make sure i’m not one of those who misremembered or misprounced.

there are two big thoughts in my head lately and please be patient as i try to make them coherent. it’s a lot easier in the chaos within and a lot harder to write them down, so also please be very proud of everyone writing here cos it’s so difficult to do so.

first big thought – the validity of words

i can hear you going “woah woah lynnda” as i type this down – no, i’m not talking about the scientific meaning of validity… but i could be! and it would be a fun discussion to have. anyway no, getting back to this. recently, very recently, i received a long message that is apparently an apology, except the fact that i know in my gut it isnt. people who read it asked me how i feel about it and i couldn’t put it into words (harhar) because the validity of the words wasn’t there. i didn’t know for a fact until later when i was told, but in the moment, the words just felt hollow. not empty – hollow. like you could see through the words and there you find nothing. i think it says a lot about a person when you can sense how valid their words are. i think you would understand what i mean. anyway this feeling strongly constrasted our many nonsensical conversations together as a trio – regardless of the content reliability, the validity of our words was always strong (slipped in a sciency reference after all).

second big thought – finding the words

ive been doing spanish on duolingo and i was telling sha about it that maybe nosotros podemos estudiar juntos. one of the words that i’ve come across is te quiero – which translate directly to i want you but is used commonly for friends, family and loved ones in spanish! i always thought it was te amo but that’s too romantic and honestly not used as much for loved ones around you. and i thought it made a lot of sense to tell people you love that you want them to be here. then i am reminded how much more love there is when you know you want them to be around and they can’t so you have to say bien.

“lynnda”