I Swear You Will Be Fine

Dear Josh,

As your birthday nears again, the feelings of heaviness are fast increasing. It’s almost like the universe timed the 2 most difficult days we will face in the year nearly 6 months apart. Maybe so it doesn’t hit us so badly all at once?

For your birthday this year, your foundation has already been set up. So we thought we would raise funds by making cupcakes. The main idea of course is to raise funds which will be used for care packages for children and parents going through grief. But there is an ulterior motive for this. We also plan to deliver the cupcakes on your birthday. The ulterior motive behind this is the hope of keeping ourselves busy that day.

I made a rough draft of the infographic for this. Shalini then worked on it multiple times improving on it. A few days ago, Jess and Shalini worked on it perfecting it for hours. (I personally would have gone with the first draft!) It was nice seeing them both working on it together. Their attention to detail is very much like yours. You must have been proud watching them.

We sent it out to our friends and family exactly 1 month before your birthday. Jess and Shalini posted it on Instagram. The response was overwhelming. We are truly blessed to have so many people supporting us. You must be feeling this too. 

But it was also heartbreaking and painfully difficult. It was a brutal reminder of what has happened. And as Jess and I discussed, the need to accept this all over again.

I guess we can never win this. No matter how hard we try.

Anyway, I hope you stay close to us as the month ends again and we go into your birthday month. Your second favourite month of the year. I would like to think you will be with us as we prepare with the orders and making of the cupcakes too!

Love Mum